no longer silenced movement

Empowering Child Abuse Survivors and Promoting Awareness

Tag: education

Blaming the Kids

I’ve worked at a Charter school, predominantly filled with children from learning disabilities to behavioral issues, basically students that require a more personalized learning experience in order to be successful. Countless times I was told by teachers to now care, countless times (as I was a 1 on 1 aide) I was told I should lose my job, and that I’m not right for it. Throughout the school year, I fought this notion.

I resent the fact that students, not typically easily to deal with, are given 1/10 of the work as other students, and regardless of the work they’d pass in, they’d pass. They’d misbehave, and still get by. They’d pass from grade to grade, learning nothing. That was my problem, the student I had, even though it was more difficult, I structured his school work so he would have to learn, which was the point of school in the first place. It was more difficult, and his grades went down because I chose his requirements, and I didn’t want teachers to just pass him. This made the email arguments saying I should be fired start, but at the end of the day, when he presented, legitimately learning, he was proud of himself, and he did exceptional.

In private, the child would talk to me about his home life, and his dream of becoming a graphical engineer. The way the school was structured, he would never be able to accomplish this. With what his family would take into account, he would never learn, and he would fail.

Everybody blames the kid, for being misbehaved, for not trying in school, for not being motivated…but when you look into it, it’s not the kid’s fault. Not encouraging your child to learn, ruins their life, it doesn’t just make school difficult for them, they feel stupid and don’t want to try, because they’re sick of failing, and if they never learn, how will they move forward or fight for their dreams? That’s the problem, they won’t.

We went from people stable to become parents, to anyone having children. If you’re trying to do what’s best for your child, you’re an incredible parent…but too often I’ve seen immature parents, who’ve never had any responsibility, and they don’t become mature and responsible when their child enters the world. Too many times I’ve seen parents, scream at their kids, or bash the other parent to their face. Too many times, I’ve seen children, dropped off to anyone, so their parents could go out. I’ve seen children abused, with social workers that let the parents sit in the room for an interview, that nobody defends…then there’s the ones who get out of their homes, to go into a poorly structured foster home, and so many have aged out of foster care, never too receive the loving parents that they deserve.

The quality of parents have gone down so far, it’s easier for parents not working to afford a child, that a middle class couple, because that’s how our system is structured, and kids are suffering, each and every day…but few do anything, and it’s the child’s life and future, that statistically speaking, will be far more difficult because of it.

Back to School

Kids are back to school…and it might be what they’ve dreaded all summer, but for some, it’s an escape. Even if it’s better than home, it doesn’t mean they’ll comply or work hard, most likely they’ll do the opposite (statistically speaking). If you work in a school, and have started back, make sure you remember this when you’re settling in. What a kid does or says to you, isn’t always a reaction towards you, and reading into their behavior can be what saves them. Being a Teacher is one of the most influential jobs pertaining to a child’s life, and also one of the most unappreciated.

It’s not your job to make sure their home life is good, but when you see the signs by spending the majority of your day with them, you can change their life. It’s extra work, with the potential to make a serious difference. Despite how a child behaves towards you, keep it in the bank of your mind that there’s a reason behind each behavior.

It’s limitless what a teacher can do for a child’s life. The ones who’ve made a difference in mind, I keep with me everyday. Good luck this school year, and remember each day that every action a child does, there’s a motivation behind it. Don’t take it personal, don’t let it stress you or bring you down, it’s not you, but whatever it is, you’ll eventually be able to figure it out and move forward with what you know. Breathe and relax, and the answers will come.

Good Things Take Time

Sorry for the wait, but I’m back to blogging again. I had a busy couple of weeks, and I realized it’s okay to take some time to get it together, and I wish more people saw it that way.

This past year, I worked at a Charter School, and if you’ve ever seen a faulty education system, this one would top that. Kids come from many different walks of life. Some with bad homes, a bad past, others simply find learning a real challenge. Working there, I witnessed every type of kid struggle, and the real culprit, were the adults that surrounded them.

Many kids yelled at me, swore under their breathe, aggressively hit desks…and they got away with it so nobody had to deal with them. They couldn’t figure out why 1/8 was smaller than 8/1, time and time again, but we moved on in class so nobody had to deal with them. A mother hated me, because I ensured her kid worked hard in order to get credit, and tried to get me fired, because it was easier to pass him so nobody had to take the time to educate them.

Children are the future, if we fail them now, they’ll give up on the beautiful experience that is learning.

If we continue to pass children, to get them by, they won’t learn, and they WILL give up on school, and they WILL give up on themselves. We have to start caring about these kids learning, no matter how difficult it may be.

Every child deserves a quality education and a future. If we teach them how to learn, then they’ll find a passion and make it happen for themselves. If we ignore the idea of encouraging their dreams…they’ll look for love in all the wrong places…drugs, teenage pregnancy, it’s not just an epidemic from nothing…it’s the kids nobody gave a chance to, nobody believed in, nobody encouraged….because if you’re that role model, that child will be resilient.