When asked how she felt right before she left her abuser on http://www.healthyplace.com/blogs/verbalabuseinrelationships/2013/03/quotes-on-abuse-from-survivors/ ….”Guilt, relief, and pity. I told myself there was nothing else I could do for him, because he would either kill me or I’d kill myself before I even graduated high school.” ~Alexandra
People who look at abuse on the outside, can’t understand how people endure it for so long. They can’t understand why victims feel guilt, about the world gaining knowledge that someone they loved and looked up to, is an abuser. The world is not black and white, and abuse is not so simple. Outsiders might see it as weakness, but I assure you, it’s not.
The reason a victim feels the way they do comes from a number of things, but they have a much better understanding on what goes on in the human mind than you think. They understand concepts you have to experience to even consider. They see their abuser, and they realize, there’s something wrong with them, and they need help. More times than not, an abuser has been abused themselves, and the vicious cycle grows and continue to mark an ugly family tradition.
It’s not to make an excuse for their abuser, or any abuser…in life we all have experiences that lead us to decisions, and no matter what it is that happened to us, we make that decision, and will be the ones to face the consequences of that decision. To be clear, I’m not writing this in the hopes that an outsider will understand, though I wish they would…I’m instead, writing this for any and all victims of abuse. If you’ve ever felt pathetic or weak based on society’s opinion, I’m here to tell you, you’re not. Never for a second, forget that you’re anything but strong and courageous, and people around the World do understand you. You’re never alone in this.